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Why – My ‘Why’

Author and motivational speaker Simon Sinek talks about the impact of finding your ‘Why’. He says it provides a path, a compass – it provides focus and direction.

So your ‘Why’ provides your truth, your purpose and why you get up every day. As humans we often act from the inside-out and that is the ‘Why’.

I learned my ‘Why’ on the 9th April 2018.

That day my husband, Den (Social Media Guru of Liberty HR Recruitment) came in to work in the office where I also worked and collapsed with a massive heart attack in front of us all.

Fortunately, a couple of the team performed CPR and when the paramedics arrived, they continued the treatment. The paramedics also had to use a defibrillator to shock him. Subsequently, we learned that Den had ‘died’ in our offices for 18 minutes.

During those 18 minutes my whole world flashed before me. I could see Den had died and the paramedic confirmed they had lost him and said they were trying to get him back. He was blue, he had gone, we were all crying. They got him to hospital, into Resuscitation and he had another heart attack. Fortunately the staff at QA Hospital in Cosham were amazing and got his heart working yet again and eventually back on his feet. I don’t know how I would have managed to get through this ordeal if it were not for the love and care of family, some dear friends and colleagues, and especially my ex-colleague Sarah Holmes who, although we no longer work together, has become a life-long friend as a result of her support.

Such an horrendous life event that affected Den and me in similar, yet different ways. We now recognise what people mean when they say ‘life is short’ and we no longer just want to settle for what we do, just because we have done it for years. One of our joint passions is travel. Similar to most people, however, we have a mortgage and bills to pay, pensions to think about etc, so there was no way we could just give up work and travel the world. Yet what we knew at that point in our lives was that we wanted to do something else and together for the rest of our working lives.

In July 2018 I had a suspected stroke. I was taken to hospital and luckily it turned out to be a severe anaphylactic shock caused by a new allergy to citrus! They have put this down to witnessing Den go through his awful episode a few months before – a form of PTSD. We carried on as best we could until the New Year when, in March 2019, when I decided to resign from the company where I had been working for over 13 years.

As Maya Angelou once said;

“If you are going down a road and don’t like what’s in front of you,

and look behind you and don’t like what you see, get off the road.

Create a new path!”

I now dress as I want; I wear my hair in different styles; I don’t sweat the small stuff; I make time for loved ones; I belly laugh as much as possible and I count my lucky stars every day. Health is wealth!

In September 2019 we launched Liberty HR Recruitment, with Den and me at the helm. And following a chance conversation with Ian Gribble, a business contact of mine, about these life-changing events, we found some clarity. Ian helped us realise that we had discovered our ‘Why’; the thing that makes us get out of bed each day, gives us our truth and our purpose.

Jane Barry FCIPD – September 2019

Leave a comment

  1. What a lovely blog! Very inspirational. Despite not knowing you, it is genuinely lovely to hear that you both have your health after such a horrid time and several scares over the last couple of years.

    Congratulations on your new path! May it be a long and happy one for you both. I’ll continue to follow you with interest and wish you the best of luck with Liberty HR.


  2. Hi Jane,

    So true…life is short and you have to make the most of every day.

    So refreshing to hear how you made the step change in your lives.

    Great.. honest and timely advice.

    All the best for your company and to a healthy future.